I thought I could forget about it . My name is Pablo, I tried emulating the dream in my mind. It was excruciating for my head. I remember it exactly now. As I entered an abandoned hospital, I saw it. The man was at the end of the hall, he then ran towards me. He was tall, pale as a ghost, and had red eyes. He was running towards me with a smirk. I ran into a room, I was scared who is this man? As the door slammed, I knew he was inside the room. My end had come…
I really like how detailed your writing is, although we were only limited to 100 words! The only thing I’d critique would be to not repeat “head” as much as you did in the first two sentences. Besides that very great story!
Spooky story! You need to war has your comma usage.
Hi Lucas, I think your writing is edgey! I like how you left it hanging/but not, at the end. Do you like writing spooky stories?
Bye for now, Evann
PS: Come check out my blog at http://evannz12.edublogs.org/